


The Guilt Of Pretty Much Almost Ending The World

by KurasuYuro



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Adam-Centric, Aziraphale and Crowley are Adam Young's Parents, Gen, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-08-12
Packaged: 2020-05-20 10:17:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19374700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KurasuYuro/pseuds/KurasuYuro
Summary: Two years after the apocal-wasnt and Adam ends up hurting his friends badly again. He starts thinking of all the terrible things he's done and certain thoughts jump into his head that unfortunately are not the best. Leave it to the ineffable Husband's to look after the antichrist and try and restore his self confidence by giving him a knowing family.Sorry if this isn't the best it's my first work because I need to vent some stuff and I don't really know how to add tags all that well so please excuse that





	1. An Insomniac Antichrist

**Author's Note:**

> This will have some graphic descriptions of violence so be careful please

Adam stared at the wall in his room while dog lay attentively at his side. Recently Adam hadn't been feeling the best and he wished he could change these feelings like he could change reality. In the past couple weeks the Them had barely spoken, well to him anyway.

He had another unfortunately run in with the voices in his head that were constantly muttering and he let them get the better of him again. He had once again scared his friends so badly they ran away. He couldn't really blame them. This time was so much worse than the last time.

While Adam was sure losing your mouth must be horrifying this time he had managed to give them nightmares of people they loved dying and forcing them to lose their eyesight. All because Pepper had said he was basically adopted and he had gotten so upset over something that was ultimately true.

Just because he had convinced Satan that he wasn't his dad that didn't mean he didn't believe it himself. The demon and angels words rung in his head. "You're very existence invites the end of the world" and the demons constant demands for him to kill everything. If his entire existence was to end everything then why even exist in the first place. A world he ultimately wanted to save, he was ultimately destined to destroy. 

He thought about how easy life would've been for everyone if he was never born.

Oh and the worst part of it all? Once again Aziraphale and Crowley had to come and end his little freak out by stopping time to calm him down. He felt so ashamed. He admired the angels endless kindness but after he had calmed down he couldn't avoid the dissapointed look he wore. Over the past two years the three had really gotten close (as much as Crowley would like to deny the fact) they seemed like an extra pair of parents to him. He had scared them both and once again his very existence had causes disaster. 

Every night his feelings would bore into him and make him realised how he shouldn't exist. He doesn't deserve too. Hes supposed to destroy everything so why do people like him and let him live. He didn't deserve it. Over the weeks he started to feel less and less guilt. He started to feel less of everything. He paid less attention in class, he didn't take Dog out as much and he definitely did not talk to anyone nearly as much as he used to. 

He wondered if in his dreams he could change reality so that he never really existed to bring pain to any of them.

............................................................................................

 

Adam couldn't sleep. Which wasn't a surprise really. Ever since the incident he had kept sleep to a minimum because he was scared of what might happen if he ever dared to dream again. He had learned three new things from this.

1)Boy, no sleep does a lot of bad things to your body  
2)It is rather inconvenient to pass out in class  
3)Not sleeping does NOT stop the voices that used to follow

They crept into his head again and whispered whatever they wanted;  
"You're at fault"  
"You'll end them all"  
"You're not trusted"  
"Kill them now"  
"Do what you're supposed to"  
"End this foolish world"  
But it was fine nothing would really reach him anymo-  
"You deserve to suffer for this"

Adam stood upright, "What?" he asked himself in hopes somebody would answer. The voice didn't repeat itself and neither did any of the others. Adam thought about the implications, "Maybe I do deserve to suffer" he thought to himself "Im such a bad person just by existing and I don't even mean to be. I tortured my friends and upset my role models. They all think im bad" 

This time the voice came back.

"Bad people get pain for inflicting pain on others"

More chimed in

"Yes, you know what to do!"  
"You know what you deserve!"  
"Suffer like you made them suffer!"

Adam gave in.

............................................................................................

 

"Adam" Deirdre asked when her son came to the door.

"Yes mum?" 

"Why have you got a hoodie on it's quite hot today?"

"I felt like it"

"Honestly dear it's the summer"

"Don't worry mum, Im perfectly fine" he smiled and out through the door he went.


	2. Stuff You Don't Want To Be Talented At

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Graphic descriptions of violence   
> Also ye Adams 13 if I haven't mentioned that before

It had been about a week since Adam had started making himself get what he deserved. Atleast that's how he thought of it anyway. He didn't think of it as self harm as much as the universe coming back around to bite him for being such a terrible thing.

Oh yeah, Adam stopped referring to himself as a person too. He wasn't one, not really anyway, so why give himself the luxury of being one. He decided that cutting and cleaning up was too much work every day so decided in-between his little sessions to add some extra bits of suffering into his pile.

He refused to eat with the excuse that he had eaten earlier or that he simply felt sick. He also attempted to dehydrate himself but if there was one pain Adam could not handle it was the headache pains that came from not drinking enough fluids. He was trying to come up with new ideas for his list but his imagination had been lacking recently.

Adam still refused to sleep as often as a 13 year old boy should probably get. Oh wait. 13 year old. He realised this meant that he was probably going through puberty which he read on after Anathema became uncomfortable from some numerous immature questions from him. He was getting taller and his voice was starting to get a little deeper.

Admittedly he had gotten very annoyed when his friends started making fun of his voice cracking but he got his revenge when Brians cracked about a month later. 

Friends.

It had still been a good while since he talked to any of them. He probably did deserve it. He doesn't know how many times they should be expected to forgive him for doing so much bad to them. One of the big reasons he didn't go up to the Them himself was that Crowley had told him that one of his powers was that he had a silver tongue and an ability to make all peoples suspicions of him fly out the window. He didn't want his friends forgiveness to solely be based on something they might not have even consciously chosen.

"That's right"

Adam shuddered in his sleep and muttered to himself "It's fine, they can't hurt me, they can't, they're just voices, ignore them, they're voices" he repeated it to himself like a mantra to stay focused on one thing.

"You're right Lord we can't hurt you"  
"But you know you deserve it don't you"  
"You cause pain to everyone"  
"End the world already"  
"Give yourself what you deserve" 

Over and over again they danced in his head while his headache grew and his already small mumbling faded out. He sat up straight and opened his draw where a tiny little blade hid. He had managed to pull it off a razor his dad gave him for the apparent reason of "You're becoming a big boy now and as you grow older a lot of things happen to your body. You'll get some hair on your face and,,, well down below. So me and your mother are making sure you're prepared" honestly it was quite scary.

He made a cut into his forearm and immediately blood oozed out. Adams eyes welled up with tears but he refused to let himself cry. No self respecting son of Satan would let himself cry. 

Adam froze. Did his mind just openly admit that Satan was his father? I guess he really wasnt convinced when he had told the demon that he wasn't his real father. 

Adam cut another deep gash into his arm and winced with pain. He had a sudden thought of "Why would I do this to myself?" When he blinked he couldn't believe what he saw. 

............................................................................................

 

Cleanup had become a lot easier for Adam. Mainly because there was nothing to clean up. Adam had learned that with his powers to change reality he was able to instantly heal his cuts. It was quite unfortunate that the healing did leave scars and did not heal emotional pain. God he wanted to feel better but he soon squashed that thought with the realisation that he did not deserve to feel better.

Adam had decided to make a trip to one of his only friends that still talked to him. He wouldn't ever regret his trips to Anathemas. She was kind and interesting and was the only one who didn't treat him any differently after figuring out he was the anti Christ. God he couldn't wait.

Adam past Anathemas cottage on his way to school and waved at her. With her dark hair platted back she lifted her head up and smiled at him. What a great friend.

............................................................................................

Anathema mixed her bowl of cookie mix around and smiled at the thought of the ensuing evening. Adam was always such a fun kid. Sure finding out he was half demon was a little scary but the kid deserved someone who would treat him just the same as before and the witch was determined to be there for him. 

As she shaped the mixture and slowly put it onto her trays her thoughts began to drift. He always looks so tired whenever he passes my cottage these past few days. It also might of been her imagination but she could've sworn he looked quite a bit thinner too. 

Anathema shoved those thoughts aside. Adam was a cheerful growing boy. It's why she made so many cookies! Truthfully he is a fun bit of new company aside from Newt. She did love the slightly confused computer engineer but it was nice to talk to someone who's imagination was just as big as her mind.

Just another hour now and he'll be here so she decided to get on some next level granny power to cook these cookies.

...........................................................................................

 

Anathema couldn't vouch for the boy himself. In her opinion it was a dreadful evening. Adam was so run down he could barely talk as much as he used to and he wasn't nearly as interested in her magazines as he used to be. It was quite strange.

The moment the witch decided something was wrong was the moment Adam refused cookies. She made two very important notes from this;  
1)Yes he had gotten a lot thinner  
2)HOLY SHIT THIS KID JUST DENIED COOKIES? USUALLY HE WILL EAT ANYTHING SWEET HE COULD GET HIS HANDS ON!

She sat down at the table with him.

"Is anything wrong Adam?" he seemed to perk up as though lost in thought "Oh no miss I just am really quite exhausted today" lost in thought or lying actually.

"Adam you seem to be constantly exhausted. For ages you've had those horrible bags under your eyes? What's wrong Adam I want you to trust me. I don't want you to think im scared of you just because you're-

Adam stood up and apparently Anathema had made a very poor decision. "A SON OF SATAN?! A DEMON?! A TOOL TO END THE WORLD? OH SURE ANATHEMA YOU CARE SO MUCH DONT YOU? THE ONLY THING YOU CARE ABOUT IS KEEPING THIS LITTLE "WEAPON" IN CHECK!" he grabbed his bag from behind his chair and ran out of the house slamming the door behind him. 

Yes, she noted, something is definitely wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this isn't very lengthy either but I just wanted to get another chapter done. I am going to try and get a third one done very soon. If you guys could leave any feedback that would be great because I don't really know if Im doing any good or not.


	3. When Life Becomes A Loop

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Self harm warning because I forgot to put it in this chapter

For the past three weeks Adam had continued his nightly plans. He would cut and slash at his body over and over again. Yet heal them, over and over again. The scars on his arms had grown numerous so he decided that he would finally give himself something new.

Adam wasn't exactly proud of what he had said to Anathema. Truly she was trying to be there when others weren't for him and now she was avoiding him. He'd made everyone scared of him. 

He was human scum.

He scoffed at himself, human scum. He needed to stop lying to himself. He wasn't human he was simply scum. Scum that had all the power in the world yet chose to do nothing with it. 

Suddenly whispers came at Adams head and he slapped his cheeks. He couldn't think like that. The voices had become more active recently and he couldn't risk another demonic release. His dad would ground him for a whole mo-

"Your dad" one or the voices piped in "You're not really human are you though"

Adam couldn't see what that had to do with anything. Atleast for a few seconds he couldn't, for he realised something he hadn't realised in the two years after he met Lucifer. 

They weren't his parents.

The people who he had grown up with were just some random family. He could've came from anywhere and what they just willingly adopted him? It was unlikely. 

At that moment a horrible thought struck him. "What if im replacing their real child?" he thought aloud. He tried to shake the feeling away but he couldn't. He had cost his parents a loving normal child by just existing, he had messed up his family. 

"NO" the voices screamed in unity "THEY'RE NOT YOURS"

Adams eyes welled up with tears before his mind reused the sentence. He had cost some parents a loving normal child by just existing, he had messed up a family.

Adam gripped his blade so hard in his hand he started to bleed which he quickly healed but not before tears started streaming out of his eyes. He deserved to suffer for eternity for all this. A stupid little demon who had done so much wrong. Adam pulled down his pajamas so that he was simply sat their in his boxers and he started to cut along his thighs. He would be lying if he said it didn't hurt. 

Not that anybody would care anyway.

Tears streamed from his eyes as he struggled not to scream from the pain as he reassured himself that he did in fact deserve this pain. He deserved everything.

For a child who had nearly ended the world, hurt innocent kids, was at fault for someone's real child being missing and ultimately was the invitation for him to ruin everything for everyone. If people weren't going to punish him, he'd punish himself.

............................................................................................

 

As Newton walked back to his house from the shop he saw Adam Young walking quietly past his house on his way to school. It was quite odd really. He hadn't talked to the kid much but he did like him, Anathema however loved him. It was all a bit odd today. Usually whenever he was on his way to school he'd ride his bike and ring the bell like it was his heartbeat fighting to survive but recently he hadn't even been seen by anyone touching it.

At first Newt had thought that maybe it was because the kid finally realised that cycling around on a girl's bike to make someone happy wasn't cool for a boy his age but it was also rather odd that Anathema hadn't mentioned him in weeks.

"Hey Adam!" he yelled in a friendly gesture and started to wave until his heart may have broke. When the kid turned around he definitely wasn't his usual self. A bright colourful face carried heavy black bags and skin that started to clasp onto a skeletal frame. What really broke him though was that when the kid had turned around tears were stroking down his cheek and he watched as the kid sniffed his nose and sprinted as fast as he could away from Newton as if he were a plague. Tears running down his cheek the whole time. 

Why can nothing ever be normal in this town?

............................................................................................

 

As soon as the witchfinder/computer engineer/not really but who knows, managed to get home he made a cup of tea for the local witch and waited for his darling to come home.

He was going to be firm for once. Get the answers he wanted.

However this did not go according to plan because as soon as Anathema walked through the front door Newt sputtered out into tears and rambled on and on about how terrible Adam had looked and how worried he was until Anathema gently patted him on the back, told him to go upstairs and solemnly walked towards the phone where she dialed a number.

............................................................................................

 

"Hello my dear?" the angel cheerfully picked up the phone with a slight him "What would you like to purchase from my book shop today? Be warned some purchases may result in immediate assasination!"

A tiny voice perked up from the other end of the telephone and Crowley watched as his boyfriend/slash husband but he was probably too obviously to notice either fumbled with the wire of the telephone. 

"Oh?" Aziraphale knitted his brows in interest and Crowley sat up to hear about what had interested his angel so quickly. "Yes we'll be over as soon as we can" the angel put down the phone and grimly walked over to the demon.

"What was all that about?" the snake asked with intrigue

"Anathema my dear she has informed me that she really missed our company and would like to invite us over for tea tomorrow"

"Who?"

"Well I believe you referred to her as 'book lady' an old friend"

"She lives in the same village as Adam right?"

"Oh yes! Our dear boy, oh how I've missed him"

"You talk about him like he's ours"

"He's such a sweet boy and as much as you hate to admit it you loved it just as much as I did when he accidentally referred to you as 'dad' you're so soft" the angel giggled at himself and the demon turned a bright crimson red 

"WELL ITS NOT IMPORTANT WHEN ARE WE GOING"

"Dear I said tomorrow about a minute ago"

"Ah yes, sorry" the demon stood up and rubbed his hands together, "should be a nice little day off"


	4. A Visit From Heaven And Hell

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight self harm warnings

Crowley loved Adam. Not that he would ever admit it. He loved really. The kind of love that makes you feel warm inside, like spending a night with your angel on the sofa together drinking hot chocolate. 

He loved Aziraphale too. What a wonderful being. Filled with warmth and quite literal light aswell as the best smile to bless the universe. The two had started living together about a month after the apoca-wasn't when Adam and Anathema basically bullied them into admitting they loved eachother. As much as Crowley had originally hated Aziraphales cluttered house he'd grown to love it all. Just as he'd grown to love Adam.

So he was honestly quite dissapointed when Anathema explained to them that Adam wouldn't be joining then on the evening they'd gone to solely to meet him. Well, Anathema and Newt were loved by the pair two but Crowley still preferred his little curly haired boy.

He set his cutlery down on the table and stretched his back on the chair.

"So why isn't the kid joining us today?" 

Anathema looked slightly downcast. 

"Well I believe I upset him"

"How so?"

"Well from what Newts told me he's looked terrible recently so I invited him over and it didn't go brilliantly"

"Not that it's my place Witchy but I don't think you should be commenting on a child's appearence" 

"NOT LIKE THAT YOU DORK!" she breathed in and out.

Aziraphale swallowed some of his chicken and joined the conversation.

"But then what do you mean dear"

"He's..." She seemed to consider her choice of words. "He's thinner, slumped and constantly tired. His eyes always look red like he's been crying and his emotions have been all over the place. He mistook my comments at our dinner for me simply treating him like some fragile wore weapon when I genuinely care for the kid. I think something is definitely wrong with him"

Crowley slumped slightly in his chair. "The first bit seems like normal teenager stuff but we'll be sure to check him out. I did come all this way to see him after al-" Crowley then shut his mouth while Aziraphale smirked evilly at him

"What was that my dear"

"SHUT UP ANGEL"

............................................................................................

Adam wasn't insane right? The voices in his head where part of his powers, nothing else. Because today his powers had made him do something he thinks he needs to make himself pay for tonight.

A kid at school named Peter tried to be all friendly with him because Adam had been crying in the school bathrooms. Honestly what a joke. He didn't need more pity. So he used his powers.

He tossed the other teen across the school yard and changed some part of reality so that he couldn't see. Peter was apparently afraid of the dark so it went as well as you'd expect. Crying and screaming. It felt good. 

But then he realised he was becoming exactly what he feared. What trash he was. He fixed Peter up and sat with him for a while. The most infuriating part was when Peter had stopped crying he instantly went back with trying to help Adam. It was..... a slight inconvenience. 

The sweet ones were always Adams weakness. The boy was adorable too. He had practically fled the school in a fluster and wallowed in his own self hatred. He did something so bad to such a nice kid. It was like the incident with The Them all over again. 

He felt terrible for being horrible Anathema, his friends, his family. Even Peter. He came to a conclusion. 

It didn't matter if the voices were real or not because he deserved what he got. He had became a monster. The entire weight of the world came crashing down on him and he felt like he was drowning.

The solution was so easy. To just forgive himself. But does he really deserve that? Happiness? After what he's done Adam isn't so sure.

............................................................................................

Adam had been crying for about ten minutes when his mother called to say that Anathemas friends were here to talk with him for a bit. Adam felt his blood run cold. 

Aziraphale and Crowley.

The two people he arguably loved the most in the world would see him in this state. They'd hate him. They'd abandon him. THEY WOULD KILL HIM.

Adam internally yelled at the voice in his head. He knew the pair would never harm him but he couldn't just let them in on everything he'd done either. So when he went down to meet the angel and the demon. He had dried his eyes and tried to disguise some red marks with makeup. This would hopefully go well.

............................................................................................

Crowley felt ecstatic. Finally they'd see their baby boy. Adam practically ran down the stairs and streamlined straight into Crowleys warm embrace. The pair chuckled and Crowley spun Adam around in his arms. 

He felt slightly horrified when he realised Anathema wasn't wrong the boy was noticeably lighter.

Aziraphale huffed in the corner "What am I a joke?"

The angel tried to look offended (which was adorable by the way) but he was clearly just as happy to see the boy as Crowley was.

"Sorry Mister Fell" the almost too polite boy laughed to himself and bombarded into the angel too. 

Crowley looked over to the pair and for a moment he thought the angel had been stabbed. Aziraphales eyes had gone wide and almost teary. Almost as if some sad winds hit him. The sadness only lasted momentarily as the Angel attempted to pick himself back up. 

"I missed you too dear boy. Thank you for the excellent entertainment by the way. Usually Crowley doesn't do hugs"

The demon blushed and kicked the ground at his feet which Adam giggled at. Anathema had whole heartedly been wrong. This was still the bright bubbly boy he's loved for years. 

"So kiddo, wanna tell us about what's been happening since we last met up"

Adams face appeared to look terrified for a moment before he just grinned.

"Of course Mister Crowley"

............................................................................................

The three conversed for about an hour before Adams mother told him it was time for bed. Crowley almost giggled at the boy and teased him for having a bed time at the age of 14. 

"Oh and please do sleep well dear" Aziraphale contributed "Anathema has been worried about your sleeping habits" 

Crowley could've sworn for a moment he saw almost pure hatred flash across his face. But that couldn't be it right? Adam was one of the sweetest kids he knew?

"Of course Mister Fell. I'll miss you two"

"We'll miss you too kiddo. Maybe we'll come back in a couple or weeks time" for some reason Crowley had a sneaking suspicion it would be a lot sooner than that.

As the 14 year old bobbed his curly haired head into the house the two ethereal beings sighed. 

"All in all I would say it's been a brilliant night. What about you darling?" Aziraphale merely hummed in response.

That's... weird.

...........................................................................................

They had been driving for about twenty minutes when Crowley asked the question

"What's eating at you angel?"

"Anathema was right about the boy"

"He seemed perfectly happy to me"

"If I recall you also said suspicion of any kind slipped off him like. What was it again?"

"Water off a ducks back my dear. Yeah what about it"

"I can feel emotions with direct contact Crowley. As soon as he hugged me I felt like my world came crashing down on me. He's seriously hurt. He has recent memories of crying for hours on end. Hurting some boy in his school and being incredibly angry at poor Anathema."

"Oh dear that's not good"

"There's something else"

"Surely it can't get worse than that?"

"I don't believe he's coping with it in the, well, healthiest ways"

Crowleys heart sunk to the bottom of an emotional out as the angels words sank in.

"What should we do?"

"I"

A year fell down the angels check

"I don't know"

............................................................................................

All in all Adam called that a success. They didnt suspect a thing and he still there to hang out with some of his favourite people for a while.

He missed the two already and their warm hugs. It had been a miracle he hadn't broke down and cried when they all hugged one last time before he had to go to bed.

But it isn't time for that. He can't control the two of them like he controls everyone else in his life and quite frankly he's with too scared to.

Adam took satisfaction as the blade cut a little deeper into the skin on his forearm. It might be bad that he started to enjoy this. The feeling of being payed back at. The universe throwing another punch at you because you DESERVE it. He threw all thoughts about Brian, Pepper, Wensley and an additional but less important Peter away. They wouldn't understand this.

He DESERVED this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG AND IS SO BAD. ITS THE FINAL TWO WEEKS OF SCHOOL AND ITS BEEN PAINFUL. I barely slept and on the weekends I was just too happy to have time to myself to write but I didn't wanna make this wait any longer. Originally I wrote a draft on Sunday but I got logged out of my account for a while so unfortunately it deleted the draft. Im so sorry this took so long but with the fact that I only have three days of school left. I'll attempt more regular uploads.  
> Btw I wouldn't worry about Peter being some main character or something. I just strongly headcannon pan Adam.  
> If people would like Peter to have a more important role in Adams story I would attempt it but it's overall up to any of you reading this because I don't want to just chuck a random character in. Even if you guys want him in he'll mainly be present as occasional emotional support and I still don't think I'd make him take a bigger role than Aziraphale, Crowley or even Anathema. Just a ship for Adam and some good ol' emotional support.


	5. A Day To Be Happy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I got some positive feedback on Peter so im just going to use this chapter for him and Adam to have some bonding before Aziraphale and Crowley hop in to help Adam

Adam felt a lot better than he had over the past few weeks Of course that wasn't a very high bar to meet but it was still special for him. It's impossible to not be in love with his..... Godparents?

Of course this happiness was immediately deminised when he started walking to school and passed Anathemas house but overall definitely a step up from the past few weeks. It had been about 2 months since he accidentally let loose on the Them, 1 and a half since he'd started self harming, about 3 weeks since he accidentally attacked that Peter kid and 2 days since his Godparents had visited and it hurt him a little bit that he had been feeling this down for 2 months even if most of his insecurities stem from over the past two years. (That was not a convenient excuse to try and set up a time lay out in my mind no sir)

School had been. Well, school. Adam wasn't exactly the smartest kid but he wasn't a stereotypical dumbass either, he was quite good at math and English but everyone else he lacked in a little bit. School was kinda a minor part of his day and the most eventful and impactful thing that's happened there for him is getting way too frustrated and throwing a kid across his school. What didn't make sense to him was Peter immediately trying to be nice when he was helped and not even asking about Adams powers. I mean it's been 3 weeks you'd think he would've questioned them, not like he'd seen Peter in the 3 weeks anyway. He barely knew the kid so he had no reason to seek him out. He didn't really want to see him either.

You ever see that trope on TV which is commenly used in children's programmes at an attempt at comedy. A character will say that she or her will not want to do something or say that something will not happen and then the complicate opposite comes true. It's such a terrible trope that is almost never funny and if you had asked Adam he would've said it was either a blessing or a curse. Neither of these responses would be directed at the actual way to he trope is used but because of what happened when the trope occured for him.

............................................................................................

 

Adam wasnt exactly shocked. It was bound to happen at some point but that didn't mean he had to be any less displeased when during one of his breaks he ran into Peter. He never got the kids last name now that he thought about it but it wasn't important really. The appearance came in a mop of messy black hair bobbing over to Adam where he sat on a bench outside. He had a bright smile on his face that almost hurt Adams eyes which probably meant bad news as far as he was concerned. It would've been adorable if not for the instant fear it instilled in him. 

If his dad could laugh at him from hell as if he was some live comedy show then he'd probably be cackling right now. The Antichrist, the Adversary, Destroyer of Kings, Angel of the Bottomless Pit, Great Beast that is called Dragon, Prince of This World, Father of Lies, Spawn of Satan and Lord of Darkness being scared of a 13 year old dark haired boy who was quite a bit shorter then him was mildly pathetic. 

Now it would be easier to say Adams fear was based solely on him accidentally hurting the boy, which it was a major part of obviously, but Peter was kind of adorable and Adam didn't know how he felt about it. He'd only had a singular interaction with him but Peter was nice and not in a forced way. It was a nice change. Almost reminded him of his Godparents. 

"-ey Adam, Adam, Adam, Ada-"

Adam may have gotten way too caught up in his thoughts which was embarrasing to say the least.

"Uh um yes?" real smooth proper first impression Adam

"Oh finally. Was wondering if you'd keep staring into my eyes for another minute or two" the boy giggled and Adam just naturally guessed that he was pretty much screwed over by now 

You see Adam had finally settled on being pan when he realised, hey I'm the son of Satan Im already going to hell so why not. But he was pretty self assured that he wouldn't fall for Peter based on two moments and he kinda wanted to stay away from relationships when he was so, hm, unstable?

"Very funny, what do you want?"

Peter looked a little taken aback "Who's to say I want anything?"

"Everyone wants something so I wouldn't assume you're different"

"Now that I think about it I suppose I do want to be your friend but if you're offended by that I can leave"

"Uh what"

The only kid since the Them.

"Well you ran off last time I tried to talk to you and I've been watching you for a while now but I didn't wanna seem rude by coming up to you randomly"

"Well you have now so- wait you've been stalking me?"

"Not important!" he blurted out "I just noticed you're always alone and thought you might need someone to talk to"

The part of Adam that wanted friends was about to beg but he didn't want to risk another episode. 

"No thanks I'm good."

"I didn't say you had a choice" he shot back playfully.

The boys sat there in silence for about 30 seconds before the silence made Adam way too uncomfortable

"Are you ever gonna ask how I threw you halfway across the school?" 

"Not if you don't want me to"

Huh. That was new.

"I don't think I want to"

"Fine by me Adam"

"Hang on I never told you my name"

"Yes you did"

No he did not 

"Well" Adam began "What is your name?"

"I thought you already knew it"

"It sounded so sweet coming from you I had to hear it again" it took Adam a moment to process what he just said and he watched as Peter blushed softly. "I-I mean-"

"Peter Fell" he rushed out quickly still quite flustered which added an octave to his voice which Adam totaly did not find satisfying at all.

"Sounds kinda religious"

Peter gave a weird all too knowing smile and responded "If only you knew"

"My parents actually named me after Adam from the Garden of Eden story actually" he had said parents like they were actually his blood after all this time of denying it. It felt weird and wrong.

"Are your parents heavily religious then?" he asked a little hesitantly

Weird, gotta note that down mentally 

"Uh no apparently some weird nun suggested it to them" he lightly chuckled at the thought of that which sounded empty and hollow, not like him at all really.

"Well, Adam do you want to be my friend?" he held out a hand smiling.

If Adam wasn't doomed already it's over for him.

"Sure" 

............................................................................................

 

That night Adam didnt self harm for the first time in a good while. It felt wrong but also right. He laid in his bed with a smile on his face that lasted until he thought back to an idea he had a couple days ago. He had called them his parents when they weren't.

Adam could fix everything right now if he wanted to but he was scared. Scared of what would happen if they found out he wasn't theirs and had stolen the true child's home. 

He set himself a limit of two weeks. Two weeks to love with them before fixing it all. 

Adam looked down at the messily written number on the sheet Peter had gave him and summoned a phone. As much as he hated his powers they were convenient sometimes and entered it in.

Adam to Peter: 11:32pm

Adam: Hey

Peter: heya Adam ;')

Adam: I already regret this

Peter:. sure you do

Peter changed Adams name to ADAM!

ADAM!: What is this

Peter: have you not seen the vine

ADAM!: Definitely regretting this

ADAM! changed Peters name to dork

dork: HEY!

ADAM: It was deserved 

dork: you capitalise the start of your sentences you monster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaa okay so tell me if I did the Peter bit way too far. OCs make me cringe and I don't wanna mess up adding him in. He really isn't a self insert if any of y'all are concerned about that I don't think I'd put him in a relationship with Adam for a while if at all because Adams way too emotionally unstable right now even if Peter exists to be sweet towards him which would help but I doubt the stress of just being committed to someone would help. Plus one of the parts I have planned would distance them greatly. So any feedback would be nice and maybe I can start updating this more frequently. Ignore the Fell bit by the way. I originally planned for Peter to be a giant contrast to Adam in a lot of ways but I think it might be stepping over the of involvement boundaries I set for my self so I just wanted to reference something just to make myself think about it. Plus it's Aziraphales human name because he can't exclusively go by that which is important if y'all would like me to cross that line I set for myself but either way just ignore it for now. Feedback would be greatly appreciated I keep repeating myself I'm just nervous about writing sofbwodnkdb

**Author's Note:**

> Im sorry this work took so long. I've been so busy and tired but hopefully with school ending in three days I'll have more time. Im sorry this is so crappy but I really don't know how to write lmao.   
> Btw I wouldn't worry about Peter being some main character or something. I just strongly headcannon pan Adam.   
> If people would like Peter to have a more important role in Adams story I would attempt it but it's overall up to any of you reading this because I don't want to just chuck a random character in. Even if you guys want him in he'll mainly be present as occasional emotional support and I still don't think I'd make him take a bigger role than Aziraphale, Crowley or even Anathema. Just a ship for Adam and some good ol' emotional support.


End file.
